She said that I say “I’m sorry” when she felt that I had no need to apologise.
I hadn’t really noticed this before but when I thought about I, she was right.
I was sorry for:
• Being slightly too late or too early
• Not answering an email quick enough
• Asking someone to pass me something
• Wanting to change the television channel
• Not having my house is showroom condition
• My children making noise when I am on a telephone call
• Not cooking a meal that I thought was good enough
• Making an admin mistake in my business
• Contacting someone who isn’t a close friend
These are just a few examples as there are so many times a day that I say or write “I’m sorry for…” that I can’t put them all down.
Now, there is nothing wrong in apologising when making a big mistake and I am the first to own up when I mess up, but I was saying “I’m sorry” for every little thing, that nobody else was bothered about, but I felt I had to apologise for.
It seems to predominantly affect women and is highly contagious.
The problem is that it makes us feel as though we are responsible for everything and that we are always making mistakes.
“I’m sorry” reinforces the self-belief that we aren’t good enough.
So today, if you find yourself apologising for something small or out of your control, stop yourself.
Be unapologetic for what you do and who you are.
Accept that you are perfectly adequate and you don’t need to be sorry for that.
You are doing great!